Top teams not to believe in

Published 6:36 pm Wednesday, October 1, 2008

OK, by show of hands, who thinks Vanderbilt stole someone’s mojo and injected it into the air holes of their players’ helmets?

That’s my fancied up way of saying, “Dang, they ain’t supposed to be this good!”

The undefeated Commodores are off to such a good start, I’m picking them as my dark horse candidate for the SEC Championship game. So dark, in fact, I can’t even see them there.

I’m happy for the folks in Nashville, really I am. But let history be a lesson. Vandy started 4-0 in 2005 with an upset (Arkansas); a not-quite-as-respectable team it still shouldn’t have beaten (Wake Forest); and a couple of cream puffs (Ole Miss and Richmond). The Commodores lost six straight and landed in the Too Bad Bowl. Before that, it was 1984 – the team lost six of its last seven. As a matter of fact, this team has only three seasons with six wins or more in the last 50 years. So don’t expect any magical runs. Not with Auburn, Mississippi State, Georgia, Duke and Florida next in line. Can the Commodores make a bowl? Definitely. Will they? My 8-ball just laughed. While we’re speaking of Duke…

The Blue Devils finally got wise, and instead of being someone else’s cupcake, they started eating some of their own. At 3-1, Duke has beaten James Madison, Navy and Virginia. Woo hoo! Hello Georgia Tech, Miami, Vanderbilt and Wake Forest – and hello, reality.

Also making “The List”…

Oklahoma State. Your coach starts going off on YouTube, and all of a sudden recruits land in your lap.

Connecticut. Who’d ever think the Huskies would be known for more than last-second jump shots? What’s that, you say? The football team has beaten opponents with a combined record of 8-13. Oh well, let’s work on the full-court press. In all seriousness, this may turn out to be the most successful team here. Its only true competition is South Florida and West Virginia.

Texas Tech. How dare you beat Nevada and Southern Methodist and say you deserve your top 10 ranking? How dare you neglect a traditional running game, denying deserving fullbacks a chance to play? For shame, Red Raiders, for shame.

Ball State. Wait, does anyone but David Letterman care about this team? … Waiting, waiting…Didn’t think so.

Penn State. More than $150,000 in bail money, and still going strong.